Friends? Who Has Time For Friends?
I know, I know. I’ve been a neglectful blogger. I have soo much going on right now.
For one, it’s tax season. I’m a tax attorney. While we do relatively few returns at our office (fiduciary returns, I don’t do personal returns anymore), I am still quite busy. Lately, I’ve been fielding compliance questions (the "do I have to file?" type), planning questions (the "should I elect to be an s corporation?" type) and the normal gamut of audits/collections/assessments/etc., which tend to pick up at this time of year. It has been maddening.
Add that to my community activities, legal stuff (I just signed on to help with the PA Advanced Directives issues) - and oh yeah, my kids and husband - and I just have way too much going on.
I’m trying to scale back, I really am. But it’s hard.
It’s even harder without a nanny (!).
And who gets left out? Well, me, of course. If you’re a parent, you totally know where I’m coming from on this one.
A friend called this morning to see if I wanted to go shopping. She is kid-less for the evening (a rarity) and is going clothes shopping. I’m not a shopping girl, but I’d love to go along just to hang out. Alas, I can’t do it.
I still owe one friend drinks. We’ve been planning drinks ever since Charlie was born. He will be one in May. That is, in a word, pathetic.
My personal theory is that the reason that women tend to have more psychological and emotional issues than men overall is because we spend far too much energy caring for and about everybody else and not enough for ourselves. And the thing is, we see and know that it’s happening and make no real effort to stop it. I can’t figure out if it’s innate, a guilt thing, worry about it not getting done (that’s my personal issue, I am convinced that if I don’t do it, it won’t get done) or some mishmosh of things.
We can’t "do it all" and yet we keep trying. What is wrong with us?
April 5th, 2007 at 6:04 pm
Kelly, it’s bad for all women, but I think women attorneys have a double-whammy. Not only are they socialized to play nice and be giving to others, but also they have the curse of the billable hour pressuring them into excessive time at work. (All attorneys tend to be socially isolated. It’s why there’s so much substance abuse and suicide in the profession.) Remember what they tell you on the plane. First put the mask over your own mouth, and then over the mouth of any children travelling with you. Friends? You’re not even taking care of your health! (Hint)
April 8th, 2007 at 6:38 am
Right on Kelly. I juggle my life to such an extent(I have twins) that some days I feel drained and just going out and taking it easy has become like a luxury. I freelance write and have it easier than most women. Still I love those moments when I can just sit back and read a book. If I complete a couple of pages, it’s like TRIUMPH!