lawmummy

I am in love with my Cuisinart bread machine. I make no apologies.

I bought said bread machine at Williams-Sonoma on January 2 in Center City. Lawdaddy mocked me - said it wouldn’t last. And yet, almost four months later, I cannot remember the last time that I purchased a loaf of bread. Every week, without fail, I make a loaf or two of sandwich bread (all kinds) and occasionally something different just for fun.

Yesterday, bananas were going soft so I made banana bread. Friends enjoyed it so I am posting the recipe:

Banana Pecan Bread

Buttermilk (1/3 c + 1 T) - you can make by adding lemon juice to milk
1/2 c Unsalted butter, chopped into pieces
2 eggs
1 tsp vanilla
1-1/4 c mashed bananas
3/4 tsp salt
1 c sugar
2 c unbleached all purpose flour
3/4 tsp baking powder
1 tsp baking soda
2/3 c chopped pecans

Quick bread cycle in the machine - make sure that you scrape the sides of the pan with a spatula after about 5 minutes so that the flour doesn’t get caked on the sides.

Makes 1-1/2 pound loaf.

Oh, so yummy. Picky daughter ate it for breakfast this morning!

I had an odd discussion with a friend the other day. Halfway through the conversation, I realized that the *thing* we were talking about wasn’t the *thing* at all. It was something else.

You see, my friend is attractive. She has always been attractive. And, well, now she’s getting older. Not old. Just older.

I know what you’re thinking… We all get older. But I think it affects people in different ways.

And me? I was never one of the pretty girls growing up. And so getting older has affected me, sure. I have a couple of gray hairs. I need a little more moisturizer than I did before. It’s harder to keep weight off than before. But it hasn’t affected my self worth. Not in any meaningful way.

But my friend? I can tell that aging means everything to her. Suddenly, she isn’t the prettiest girl in the room anymore.

My brother is having a similar issue. He was the cute guy in school - blonde, muscled and an athlete. Women tried to pick him up all the time. And as he’s gotten older, I can tell that he’s less sure of himself.

Not me. I feel smarter as I get older. I know more. I fear less.

I never thought of not being the cute girl as a plus. But apparently it is.

Some of you may know that I am no longer writing my book blog for b5media. I have been so busy that I wasn’t able to commit to keeping up the pace that I needed to make the blog successful.

I do, however, still love children’s books and will be reviewing them from time to time.

Up today? The Dangerous Alphabet by Neil Gaman.

I’ve mentioned before that I’m a Gaman fan - and I remain one. I wasn’t planning on showing this book to my kids, though, cause it’s kind of creepy.

Amy found it anyhow. I was a little concerned that it would freak her out - the illustrations, while beautiful, are definitely disturbing. There are giant eyeballs, kids with bones and body parts visible and pictures of the underworld.

To my surprise, Amy loved it. Really loved it. She made me read it over and over. She was fascinated.

And for me? Reading it was actually entertaining. The book is a long poem written by Neil Gaman and illustrated by Gris Grimly - each letter of the alphabet tells part of the story. It’s definitely not your run of the mill alphabet book.

Amy’s favorite part? At the end of the book, the kids get their skin back. That should tell you about all you need to know.

The book is hardback only, available April 29, for $17.99. I assume the book is for older kids but my (almost) 4 year old and my (almost) 6 year old both loved it.

You can also enter the sweepstakes.

It is a ridiculously quiet morning at the house. Well, relatively speaking. Charlie is screaming “I want TV” in between spurts of reading.

Amy is still sleeping. She has officially missed her window for getting to preschool this morning but I’m okay with that. She had a long weekend and I fear that she is catching a cold. Rest is good.

Katie managed to get off to school this morning despite a wardrobe crisis. She came down dressed in her new shorts - which was thrilling as we’ve been trying to keep her away from the same dresses day after day. The down side? It’s 50something degrees outside. I tried to get her to put on some long pants but she has lately developed an aversion to long pants. They must be soft. The answer? Yoga pants. I bought her a pair of great purple yoga pants from Danskin… She loves them but does not want to wear them to school. Why not? They are, she told me, only for yoga. The child has been to yoga once. Once.

Despite the drizzly gray skies, I went walking today with a friend. I am determined to get in better shape and have been ramping up efforts a little bit at a time. It started months ago with a once weekly work out at the Y. Then a couple of weeks ago, I upped it to 2 times. Now more walking. I’ll get in shape for that Philadelphia Marathon yet!

Oh. And the marathon.

Do you twitter? I twitter (twitter.com/taxgirl) and so I twitter about the Marathon. If you twitter, you know it’s 140 characters or less. So I mention that I’m doing the Marathon, only the 8k. I get a note from another attorney who is running a marathon in fall, wants to do a blog challenge. I remind him I’m only doing 8k - it wasn’t like it could have gotten lost in the myriads of text - and he replies that he didn’t see that. I reply that I have 3 small children and don’t have the energy to run a marathon… you know, trying to get out gracefully. He replies that he had 5 children and he has run marathons with each of them in a jogger stroller - and with the twins, he used a double stroller.

Chris thought I should write back that I only have one leg.

You see, this is irritating for a lot of reasons. One, don’t one up me. I’m not trying to be competitive. I just want to be able to be healthy and keep up with my kids.

Two, read the whole thing before you send me a message. And it’s only 140 characters. It doesn’t take that long. I am not surprised, I will add, to find that it was an attorney on both counts (being competitive and not bothering to read the whole thing). Many attorneys don’t pay attention when you speak - I think it’s the billable hour.

Three, I am sure that I will be labeled sexist for this but I’ll say it anyway… In most cases, children are not as tiresome for men as for women. There’s the sheer toll that a pregnancy - any pregnancy - takes on your body which cannot be discounted. Multiply that times three and you get… me. I don’t care about Posh or Halle Berry or any of those other famous moms. Most mothers find it harder and harder after each pregnancy to bounce back.

And even if you work, studies have shown that women still do a disproportionate amount of work at home.

My husband helps out at home and is good at spending time with the kids. But even he doesn’t quite “get” how draining it is to be climbed on, clung to, cried at and depended on for most of the day. Every day.

So pardon me if I’m not in the shape to run a marathon tomorrow. I’ve been a little busy.

Sheesh. Now I feel better.

Today, I signed up to run a piece of the Philadelphia Marathon.

No, no need to check that URL. It still says lawmummy.com. It’s really me.

I have been going to the gym twice a week and needed a bit more inspiration. A reason to keep going. You see, despite the fact that my pants are smaller, my weight has not budged (and please don’t tell me that muscle weighs more than fat, I do not care). I just need some kind of measuring stick that tells me that I am getting some kind of results. Hence, the Philadelphia Marathon.

The run is on November 23, 2008 - just before Thanksgiving - which gives me plenty of time to train. It costs $25 to enter for the 8k (what I signed up for).

So I’m in… You can register here. Anybody else?

So, I’ve spent the better part of the day trying to sort out my IDs. The rogue “taxgirl” IDs floating around are becoming a problem - for a bunch of reasons.

If you’ve been looking, you can find me at twitter.com/taxgirl

While I *get* what she’s saying, I hate this idea that you have to be “engaged” with your children at all times. You can’t be. You just can’t.

I received a note at the law firm this week from someone who had stopped by last week - on tax day when I was sloppy and in jeans - to say hello. She mentioned in her very nice note that I looked more relaxed than when she last saw me.

Funny.

I don’t feel more relaxed.

In fact, just the opposite.

I feel as though every moment of my day is accounted for - by someone else. I am just absolutely worn out, bone tired.

But I kind of got what she meant.

Last year, I was very overwhelmed by a lot of obligations, many of which were tied closely together. And while I stand behind the things that I was doing, and while I felt strongly that I was making my mark and doing the right things at the time, I didn’t feel appreciated.

There’s a lot of stories and a lot of baggage - none of which will do anybody any good to rehash. But let’s just say that it was not a fun time for me.

The most disappointing part of the whole thing is that all of this energy that I was expending took time away from my friends, family and all of the people and things that are really important to me. And not a single thank you.

I’m not kidding.

So I finally took a look at things and made some changes. I started saying no a lot more.

It was really difficult for me. When I said no the first time, I received some fairly negative feedback. And when I said it again, it was pure awful.

I cried a lot. I felt demeaned and belittled and unappreciated.

Chris’ theory - and he was right - was that this was the clearest sign that it was time for me to walk away.

I did.

Life has not slowed down since that time. I thought maybe it might. If anything, it’s gotten more complicated and more ramped up. But the difference is that this time, it’s more about my own family and my own commitments to the future (whatever that may be).

I know this sounds a bit muddled. It’s just something that I felt that I needed to get out for a bit - and I didn’t want to burn bridges or call anyone out - so it’s been difficult. And the lack of anonymity has made it even more challenging.

But there you have it.

I used to loooooove this show… But Tyra has apparently been bathing in too much crazy juice. She’s all over the place.

Anybody else finding the show a little tiresome this season?

Spam in my inbox had “Kelly Erb’s Naked Video” in the subject line. Really? And here I had no idea…

C’mon Mr. Spammer, nobody needs that mind picture. Please stop.